


It's A Trip!

by Tinned_Beans



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Road Trip, California, Fluff, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Holidays, Multi, Steve Rogers is done with everybody, all the avengers in one minibus, fight me, lots of shitty motels, no one died, shield not being used for intended purposes, which is never a good idea
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-12 09:21:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29133222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tinned_Beans/pseuds/Tinned_Beans
Summary: Avengers go on a road trip to blow off some steam after Thanos. Cliche, I know, but I had fun writing it. They go from New York to Napa Valley in California. I had to google the route, so the geography is probably not 100% accurate, but oh well.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Loki/Pietro Maximoff, Tony Stark/Stephen Strange, Wanda Maximoff/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37





	1. A Pleasant(?) Discovery

"Clint, just get in the minibus."

"Nope. Not with that dip shit."

"Hey!"

"You started it back with that 'you didn't see that coming?'" Clint mimicked.

"In my defense... You have a good point"

Nat rolled her eyes, "not really a defense..."

"I hadn't finished! I was about to add that it happened ages ago, I saved you from a guy with a machine gun, and..." Pietro was gone in a blue flash. He appeared in the minibus with Clint over his shoulder. "Bet you didn't see that coming :)"

"You little bastard"

\----------------

As a celebration for defeating Thanos, the Avengers were taking some time off to relax. Steve and Sam had booked a large holiday house near a vineyard in Napa Valley, California, for them to stay a few weeks in. It was a gorgeous place, huge, with a veranda over looking the grape vines, and away from everything. It was far from the main road off a little dirt track, but the terrible road would definitely be worth it. There was a pool in the back, and a terrace too, with a barbeque. Clint and Thor were especially looking forward to the last one.

They were driving a minibus that they were renting over there. Stephen had offered to make a portal, however it wasn't that reliable as he'd never seen the place before, except in pictures, and Sam had insisted no super stuff for the whole week. This, of course, meant they all had to find someone to sit with on the trip there.

Tony was sitting with Stephen, Wanda with Natasha, Steve was driving and Bucky had insisted on sitting up front with him. Rhodey was sitting with Vision - they'd surprisingly become good friends after Civil War - and Bruce had to take 2 of the back seats with Thor lounging across the remaining 3. Scott was staying as home because he wanted to spend some time with Cassie and Hope, and Sam was also sitting in the front with Steve and Bucky. This meant for the first day, Clint got to sit on his own. Carol had said she'd meet them at their first stop off in Indianapolis as she had to get Goose from Nick's house first. She'd missed him lots. When she arrived, Clint was being forced to sit with Pietro.

This is what they'd discussed yesterday. Today they were leaving. Late. Wanda, Bruce and Tony hadn't packed until that morning and everyone else was running back in and out of the compound trying to remember everything they might need. Steve, Nat and Sam were the only ones who had calmly takes their seats after breakfast, knowing there was no point telling everyone else to hurry up - it would make no difference.

Now, Nat was standing outside the minibus arguing with Clint about sitting with Pietro while the others peered nosily out of the window. Tony was laughing, and it was contagious - Nat was side eyeing him every so often and trying to keep a straight face herself. Once Pietro had gotten Clint on the bus she ran in after and locked the door. Clint gave her a death stare.

"Drive Steve, before bird-brain No.1 escapes," she called.

Sam rolled his eyes, "this could be seen as abuse y'know."

\----------------

The journey there was relatively uneventful. Tony spent the first half hour babbling to Stephen about a new suit he was making, before passing out in his shoulder. He's gotten about 3 hours sleep the previous night. They'd both gone to bed around 12, but Tony had woken up only a few hours later realising he'd forgotten to pack. He'd poked Stephen awake and been, in his eyes unfairly, growled at, before Stephen had turned over and gone back to sleep. This left Tony alone with an empty suitcase at 3am... Things went south fast after that.

Thor and Bruce were chatting about Asgardian technology. Thor was explaining about Heimdall and the Bifrost, and Bruce was listening intently, planning to discuss building one with Tony when they got back. Later in the trip Thor had started playing Among Us with Korg and Miek, so Bruce had put on headphones.

Wanda and Natasha were both wearing headphones and listening to music to start with. About halfway through the journey Wanda had started to play with Nat's hair, braiding it and re-braiding it, until eventually she fell asleep against the window. Nat had chuckled softly, removed both their headphones and settled down gently against Wanda's side.

Rhodey and Vision both read for the journey. Rhodey was going through the news in California on his phone and Vision was reading a crime thriller. He could read books in the snap of fingers as he could just download the content, however he liked to read murder mysteries at a normal pace. He liked trying to figure out who did it - no matter how unrealistic it seemed.

Steve liked driving, that's why he'd offered. He found the hum of the road under the bus relaxing and he liked being in control too. However, Steve wasn't a good driver. He was terrible at following Bucky's directions, no matter how clear they were, and had a bad habit of swerving around the road - effectively doing a handbreak U-turn - when he missed a turn off. He'd also once fallen asleep while driving at night and woken up to find Bucky leaning across him desperately trying to steer the car into a nearby gas station. The only reason he was driving was because only Bucky and Sam knew how bad he was, and they we're both sitting there next to him to keep an eye on what he was doing. Also no one else wanted to drive. Currently Sam was staring out the window and gripping the seat whenever the bus turned. Bucky was talking to Steve, making sure he stayed awake, and reminding him where to turn off every so often.

Thankfully, for today, Clint didn't have to sit with Pietro. Carol was collecting goose, so there were some extra seats. Clint was sitting across 2 seats with his head on a pillow against the window, sleeping. Meanwhile, Pietro was listening to music, also sprawled across both seats. He was reveling in the fact that just for today he didn't have to put up with Clint.

\----------------

They stopped off at a hotel in Indianapolis over night. Steve had spent almost 12 hours driving and was ready to keel over. It was closing on 11pm. He was currently starfished across his and Bucky's bed. He had tried to stay away while Bucky went out to get take out food, but he just couldn't do it. Bucky came back to a star-spangled snoring lump, and after pulling the covers over his boyfriend, proceeded to his chicken korma alone.

It was a similar scene throughout the other Avengers' rooms. Stephen and Tony were curled up together watching some terrible local TV show, drifting somewhere between consciousness and sleep. Wanda and Nat were both dreaming, Bruce and Thor were eating pot noodles while having a thumb war, Sam was asleep, as was Pietro. The only one truly awake was Clint who'd slept through the whole journey. He was playing darts with a cheap velcro set he'd bought at the gas station down the road.

\----------------

All was peaceful and quiet.

Then thud. Clint ran to the window to see a light disappear behind the bus. He searched through his bags for a minute before he found some small throwing knives he'd packed just in case. Sheathing them up his jacket sleeves, he went out to investigate.

He was crouched on the other side of the bus and could hear a rummaging noise, as well as some muffled squwaks.

"Clint, I know you're there," came Carol's voice. "Just come round, we have a code... Blue."

"Blu-oh. That blue." Before Clint stood Carol, a pair of scissors in one hand, and a lanky man in green and black robes in the other. Loki. "How- wha- why?!"

Carol ripped off the duct tape over his mouth.

"I swear it wasn't my fault this time," Loki for once told the truth. He was gasping slightly after not being able to breathe properly for goodness knows how long.

"I was keeping a low profile after the purple raisin, but Thor caught me last Tuesday when I went out to get coffee. We'd been chatting, he told me about the trip, I said no thanks, and then I wake up in the trunk if a bus. It's been a wonderful journey by the way. Give my most sincere thanks to Captain America," sarcasm dripped off his words. Steve's handbrake turns had been uncomfortable for the passengers in the padded seat... Loki had been in the trunk with the luggage.

"I'll get him in the morning," Clint sighed. "You got a room?"

"Nah, I'll just stay in the bus."

Side eyeing Carol, "do we trust him?" Clint asked.

"Sure. I forgot to book a room too so he won't be alone."

Now, you might think this would end badly, what with Carol easily being one of the most powerful avengers, and Loki being the God of Mischief, however they got on unusually well. Carol thought he was hilarious, and Loki was glad he was being laughed with and treated as an equal, rather than being laughed at and looked down on.

\----------------

When the avengers returned to the minibus no one was suprised to see Loki out like a light across 3 of the back seats and Carol scrolling through Twitter. Most of them had just lost the ability to be surprised after endgame and the time travel, or even just being snapped out and into existence again.

Carol and Loki sat in the back with Bruce this time and Thor was in Pietro's old seat. The only seat left was next to Clint. Pietro slunk into the vacant seat while Clint glowered at him. Steve started up the bus again.


	2. Frisbee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2 - it's in the title. Avengers are getting very bored and Pieto is a little shit.

Today it was Sam's turn to drive. Steve was staring out the window and occasionally giving Sam a direction. They didn't talk much as Sam preferred to focus on the road. Bucky was passed out, slumped against Steve. Road trips and driving made him sleepy.

The avengers in the back were louder today. There was only so much music you could listen to, or so much Californian news you could read. Thor had created a Minecraft server that Carol, Bruce, Pietro, Wanda, Natasha and Tony had joined. Loki was banned after he blew up Natasha's house. She scared him, and everyone wanted to keep Loki at least alive for the rest of the trip. Explaining why there was a dead body in the trunk would be hard to explain if they got pulled over. Loki had headphones on now and was cackling madly at his phone every so often. Everyone was to scared to ask why.

Stephen had refused to play - he felt such games were beneath him. What wasn't beneath him was back-seat-playing. He was staring over Tony's shoulder, suggesting building materials and repeating "kill it, kill it, kill it" whenever Tony came across a zombie or a skeleton. Tony wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh at the cuteness of it, or punch Stephen out of frustration.

Things weren't going as well for Clint. He had taken the window seat and was squished into the wall as far as possible away from Pietro. He'd left his headphones in his suitcase so he was just angrily pressed against the window. Every so often he'd check his phone and text Bruce for a bit. Pietro was listening to music and building an underground cave system, spread out on his chair, taking up as much space as possible. He was tapping his foot against the floor, and had been doing so for the past hour now. Clint was slowly going mad, fuming silently into the window, and Pietro had a huge grin plastered across his face.

He'd tried being nice after Ultron, he really had, but boy could Clint hold a grudge. He'd done dinner, he'd done laundry, he'd been very careful not to make any speed jokes around Clint, but no. It made no difference, so now Pietro had resigned himself to his fate. His logic was, if Clint was gonna hate him, he'd make the most of it.

Vision was reading again today. He was working his way through Agatha Christie, while Rhodey was hooked over the back of Tony's seat. He was just watching Tony play for a lack of anything better to do.

\-----------------

In the evening they stopped off at a motel in Kansas City. They got there at around 8pm and had some time to kill, so Natasha and Wanda made spaghetti, Steve found some old, fold up patio furniture, and they had dinner outside.

Earlier, Rhodey was going through the bus trying to find a game when he had a thought.

"Hey Tony!" Rhodey called, "I got an idea and your gonna love it."

After getting no answer he picked up a stone near by and lobbed it at Tony's door. Tony stuck his head out of the door; his hair was a scruffy mess and his Led Zeppelin t-shirt was wrinkled at odd angles.

"Whaaat?" He whined.

Waving Steve's shield in the air, "I have an idea " he said, grinning.

Tony stuck his head back into the room, "Stephen, get a shirt on, Rhodey's got an idea."

A few minutes later they both walked out to find Rhodey leaning against the back of the minibus.  
"Boys, we have the chance of a life time. The chance to fulfill our dreams," Rhodey stood up, raising the shield above his head, "it's frisbee time."

Steve with came back to find Tony and Rhodey tossing his shield back and forth across the parking lot. Stephen was lying against the wall near the door to his room. He was unconscious and had an ice pack taped to one side of his head. The other Avengers were continuing on as normal, like nothing was different. Occasionally the shield would get thrown in Bruce's direction and he'd hurl it back. Tony had to use his suit glove to catch it.

Bucky prodded Steve and pointed at the scene. He opened his mouth, but Steve beat him to it: "you really wanna ask?"

"Good point. HEy! We got the chairs!" Bucky called, raising two up with his metal arm.

It wasn't as picturesque as they'd hoped. They had a lovely view of the Chuck E. Cheese across the road and lorries drove up and down the freeway every few minutes. There was a pretty cool sunset though, and Wanda was a reasonable cook.

\----------------

The next day everyone was crabby. The rooms had been uncomfortable and no one had gotten much sleep. Nat was also in a bad mood. Wanda was a restless sleeper and had pushed her out of the bed around 2am.

Most of them went back to playing Minecraft. There were lot more explosions that yesterday though. Vision gave up reading. Steve was driving again today and he was even worse, seeing as he was suffering from lack of sleep. The minibus rocked was he turned on sharp bends, and half the time when he braked everyone shot towards into the seat infront of them.

Tony and Stephen had been watching a movie again, but gave up when the phone slid back under the seats for the 3rd time after a particularly nasty sudden brake. Stephen's head was still pounding after yesterday and he was on some painkillers Tony had packed. Steve's driving wasn't helping though and the painkillers were messing with his head too. Tony was now pressed into the window as a sleepy sorcerer slumped against him.

Thor was being an arsehole and messing with the player permissions. Every so often you'd hear a giggle and a "wait, fuck," then a shriek from Bruce as Thor switched him back to survival before killing him.

"Dude?!"

"Leave me be, I'm losing the will to live here," Thor replied.

"We all are with Steve's driving," Pietro called, "you ain't special."

"Bold words from a man about to be tazed," Thor returned.

"Wha- yEeSh!!" Pietro narrowly missed a low voltage lightning bolt aimed at him. It hit Clint instead.

"FuCK! Who did THAT?!"

"Dumb question," Nat replied. She had a smirk on her face, but she kept her head down and pulled her hood up, out of Clint's line of sight.

Nat was wearing a hoodie she'd 'borrowed' from Steve, and had her legs across Wanda's lap. Wanda laughed at the sassy comment (she was the only one in a vaguely good mood.) She was drawing circles with her thumb through Nat's sweat pants and occasionally humming to music. Nat fell asleep after an hour or so: cuddles with Wanda always mad ever feel comfortably drowsy.

A few seconds after the shock Clint realised something... Pietro was out of his seat. Scrambling as fast as possible he swung his legs up and lay across both seats - he only just managed it before Pietro turned around. Smiling with a shit-eating grin, "bet you didn't see that coming."

\----------------

Pietro, admitting defeat, swiped Thor's feet off the seat behind Clint and sat down there.

"Hey!" Thor said, not really meaning it though.

"Look, you can trying to shock me again, but do you really wanna risk hitting Vision?" Pietro replied, not even looking up, and putting his headphones back on.


	3. A Sleepless Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 3 - there aren't any places to stay so the avengers have to sleep in the minibus. This was always going to be a bad idea...

Their next stop was in Rawlins, in Wyoming - aka, the middle of nowhere. The problem was there was literally nowhere else they could stop off if they wanted to reach Napa Valley the next day. There were no available hotels this time so everyone had to sleep on the bus.  
This would be a bad plan even if it was just a group of ordinary people on a minibus, however it was the Avengers.... in other words, the town is on fire, God is dead.

\----------------

The initial problem was that Clint couldn't sleep. He'd slept constantly for almost 2 days now and it was messing with him. It was now 1am, most of the other Avengers were asleep, and Clint felt like he'd just downed an Expresso shot. He tapped away on his phone for a bit but it didn't alleviate the growing boredom. He got up to walk up and down the aisle, however he missed his footing on the step down.

If you've ever tripped on a bus before, you'll know just how awkward it is. Limbs seem to take up a lot more space than they should normally, and it's very hard to stop tripping over new things once you've fallen over the first thing.

Clint was now clutching the edge of Stephen's seat, trying desperately not to slip any further. That's about the time when he realised what he'd tripped on - Bruce's leg (he was sleeping in the aisle because the seats were too small.) How he realised it was Bruce's leg was rather more complicated, seeing as it only happened a good few minutes after Clint landed on the floor with a cut lip and a bruise on the under side of his chin.

The realisation process started with stage one: Bruce moving his leg in his sleep. Clint, not realising it was a leg which he was standing on, freaked and whipped his feet off the floor, only to find himself sinking like a stone. Damn gravity. The next stage of the process started when his descent was halted abruptly by the objection of Stephen's armrest. Clint's chin slammed into it, before (and this was the final stage) his whole body fell backwards, so he landed on his back, splayed out over Bruce. After a few moments of stunned silence, Clint remembered.

Clint was snapped out of his state of shock when Bruce shifted, left out a scream, and leapt up, throwing him towards into the floor.

"Mother fucker," Clint snarled into the floor.

"CliNT?! What the hell are you doing??" Bruce whisper-shouted.

"Trying to stand up."

After a few moments of confused silence from Bruce, Clint stood up and got back into his seat, hugging in his bruised knees and leaning sideways into the back of the chair.

"Bruce..." Clint asked slowly, "what was the scream for?"

Bruce grinned, "well, I felt a huge weight land on me..."

"Hey!"

"...and then I opened my eyes to something fuzzy in my face and some completely black limbs spread across me."

"...and..."

"Basically I thought you were one hella big spider," Bruce grinned cheesily again.

Clint raised an eyebrow. "You're the Hulk..."

"It's an irrational fear, yes, but a very real one. I hate spiders."

Their conversation was now interrupted by Vision's voice. "What the hell are you two on?! It's 01.42am and we all wanna sleep!"

"Sorry Google. You know where any plasters are?" Clint replied.

Rolling his eyes, "come round to the back, I think I've got some in my suitcase," Vision said.

All three of them climbed out of the minibus and Clint tried to recall the events of the past 15 minutes to explain the bruises and cuts. Bruce was adding bits he missed out occasionally.

"And then he threw me off into the floor," Clint continued.

"Yeah, I thought he was a giant spider or something," Bruce added.

"Wait, Bruce, why are you out here too?" Vision asked, only just remembering Bruce didn't actually need to be there.

"Oh, I'm not gonna sleep now. Just... Spiders."

Vision gave a confused head shake before continuing to patch up Clint.

\----------------

Once Vision had finished they all sat down outside the bus. Clint was now both wired on too much sleep, and the remains of an adrenaline rush from the bus; Bruce didn't want to sleep incase he started dreaming of spiders (it sounded stupid, but he hated them. They terrified him - the eyes... the legs... the feeling of them crawling over his skin - he hated them); and Vision, who didn't need sleep, was bored and wanted to keep them company.

They were chatting about what they had planned when in Napa Valley when Rhodey stumbled out of the bus.

"You guys are loud, you know," he grumbled.

All three collectively looked above them to the open window, before exchanging glances with eachother.

"Sorry," Vision half smiled.

"So," Rhodey grinned back, "did you find the marshmallows yet?"

"Marshmallows?!" Clint's head whipped up.

Rhodey dug about in the trunk before yanking out several large packets of toasting marshmallows.

"Nice," Bruce and Clint highfived.

"Guys... You need heat for toasting," Vision reminded them. Dumbasses.

"Oh I have a plan for that too. Bruce, get some kindling, Clint, get wood, I've got fire lighters in my bag."

Shrugging, Clint and Bruce went off to get stuff to start a fire. Vision was growing suspicious.

"And where, pray, are you going to make this fire. We're surrounded by fields and it's the middle of summer. This place will go up like a tinder box if you mess this up."

"Don't worry C3PO, I got this," Rhodey replied, then in a voice filled with overwhelming smugness, "could you pass me Cap's shield?"

"You've got to be kidding," Vision muttered. He was grinning inwardly though as he went off to get it.

\----------------

Stephen woke up to a burning smell in the small hours of the morning. He panicked, jumping up to find 3 avengers missing. His panic evaporated when he saw Vision was missing though. He wouldn't let anything stupid happen? No. He wouldn't. However, he peered out the window to find a sight that made him lose what little faith in humanity he had left.

Clint, Rhodey and Bruce were sitting in a half circle with their backs to the bus. In the centre of them was Steve's shield, upturned, with soft red flames flickering out of it. There was a pile of empty packets and gooey sticks next to them, and empty beer bottles were joining the mess at an alarming rate. Clint was doubled over, shaking with laughter; Bruce was slumped against the side of the bus and draining what looked like his 3rd bottle - Hulk must have greatly increased his tolerance. Rhodey, who was laughing with an 'I shouldn't be enjoying this but it's too hilarious not to laugh at' expression, had his head in one hand.

In front of the fire was Vision, recognisable only by the ethereal glow around him, as he'd taken the form of Captain America. He was sitting backwards on a chair, mimicking Cap's Sex-Ed PSA.

Stephen was outraged. What they were doing was dangerous - to themselves and potentially the entire town - and they were adults. Hell, they were the earth's mightiest heroes. He was so outraged in fact, that he poked Tony awake, so Tony could go and tell them off.

\----------------

Tony woke to a sharp dig in the ribs. Cracking his eyes open a slit he said groggily, "what now?"

He was greeted by a snickering Stephen. "Look out the window," Stephen looked like he was about to burst.

Turning, Tony was met with the same sight Stephen had seen 5 minutes ago.

"Wanna join them?" Stephen grinned.

"Free booze and mocking Cap? You couldn't stop me," Tony replied, smiling devilishly.

They both leapt up and raced out the door.

"Rhodes! You got any beer left?" Tony called.

Rhodey chucked him a bottle out of the cooler he was leaning against. Stephen plopped down on the other side of the cooler, and Tony leant up against him after collecting an unopened packet of marshmallows. Opening the bag he started eating them, forget the toasting.

"Uh, Tony, you wanna toast those?" Bruce asked.

"Ngh," Tony replied lazily, "can't reach. Too comfy."

Stephen popped the cap off a beer and Vision returned to his act.

\----------------

Natasha was woken close to 4am by the sound of soft laughter and chatter floating in through the window. As she sat up, the removal or pressure from Wanda's shoulder woke her up too.

They both stuck their heads out of the open bus door. Nat's hair was in a braid again so it was vaguely tidy, and her tank top looked neat-ish with her sweatpants and hoodie. Wanda on the other hand was a mess. Her hair was everywhere and she needed to change her t-shirt as it had a large coffee stain down one side.

"Hey, Tash! Cousin IT! Wanna join us?" Tony called on seeing them.

Wanda gave a sleepy eye roll. "Give us a minute."

They both went inside, Nat to wake up Thor, Carol and Loki, Wanda to change her top and do her hair in a messy bun.

The five of them came out, Loki's face lighting up on seeing Steve's shield on fire, Thor's lighting up on seeing the beer.

\-----------------

Bucky had always been an early riser. He liked watching the sunrise, he thought the sky was the most beautiful that time of day, and he liked being ready for the day too. He woke up around 5.30 to the sky lightening through the windscreen. Sitting up, he gently removed Steve's arm from around him, and went into the main part of the bus... To find it empty.

Worried, but not wanting to wake Steve just yet, Bucky shook Sam awake.

"They're gone."

"Whaaat, whaT NoW?!" A sleepy Sam started to come to terms with the problem as he was dragged into the back of the bus by an anguished Bucky.

"Great," he mumbled, "let's go find those idiots."

They didn't have to walk far. Stepping off the bus, they were greeted by the smell of sugar, alcohol and smoke. Tony and Stephen were asleep together against the bus - Tony must have had a few too many beers and he had slid almost all the way down, but was still clutching Stephen's waist, Stephen had an arm around his shoulders and was snoring quietly. Thor and Natasha were doing shots out of some empty shampoo bottles, provided by Wanda, while Carol and Loki were chanting "shots". Vision had passed out, still dressed as Steve, and Bruce and Clint were busy covering him in grass cuttings while giggling. Hulk hadn't helped that much with the alcohol after the 5th bottle. Rhodey was also passed out against the bus, but with a little more dignity than Tony and Stephen.

Sam stood there a while, drinking in the scene, but Bucky chuckled at the sight and went to chat with Wanda. After the moment of confusion had passed, Sam took the last beer in the cooler, before going to chat with Bruce and Clint. Hopefully he could distract them and remove the grass from Vision before he woke up.

It wasn't long after Sam and Bucky had arrived at the party that Clint and Nat had begun singing, with Here Comes the Sun, as it rose over the horizon. Rhodey, Wanda and Bruce had joined in at Don't Stop Me Now, and everyone had started when Bohemian Rhapsody came up. No one can resist Freddie Mercury.

\----------------

When Steve woke up around 7.30, he smiled. It was a nice, peaceful morning, the birds were singing, and he went into the back to wake the other Avengers for the last stretch of the journey.

On finding them absent, he frantically ran out of the bus, only to grind to a halt, and almost fall over at the sight he was met with.

Luckily, Vision had been de-grassed but was still asleep along with Stephen and Tony. The other mostly awake, and drunk, avengers we're all gathered in a circle around Stephen's burning shield, singing the Hallelujah. Most of them were swaying to the song too, and beer bottles littered the area.

Steve stood there dumbfound. Watching the avengers drunkenly attempt to summon Satan, with a clone of himself passed out against the bus.

He had been wrong. He hadn't entirely lost the ability to be surprised.


	4. Arrival (Finally)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 4 - arriving at Napa valley. Very tired superheros and a very done Captain America.

Driving a group of hungover superheros was... Interesting. Especially as they had to drive for 15 hours if they wanted to reach Napa Valley that day. On the plus side, they started earlier than planned seeing as almost everyone was already awake.

Stephen had woken with a start to Bucky shaking him. He'd jumped up, stumbled against the side of the bus, and failed miserably to create the Shields of the Seraphim. He ended up punching Bucky in the arm instead, before doubling over in pain - he'd hit the metal arm. Tony had woken up fine, almost completely normal, except slightly slower, and brought Stephen onto the bus.

Over the journey Tony had given Stephen the window seat incase he felt ill. They were both currently going through a packet of Polos and talking about the holiday. Tony wasn't sure what he wanted to do, he wasn't used to having much free time, and when he did, he spent it in his lab tinkering with machinery. Stephen was adamant he wanted to go snorkeling. His words were slightly slurred and he was laughing, desperately trying to pronounce jellyfish. Tony was smiling, wondering how he'd managed to get so lucky. He'd found the best idiot in the world.

\----------------

Rhodey had woken up at the commotion made by Stephen, and had elbowed Vision awake, who was now picking the remaining blades of grass from his suit. It was only when he got onto the minibus that he remembered he still looked like Steve, and switched back to his normal form.

They'd both gone to sleep after the bus started moving. Rhodey, trying to catch up on much needed sleep, and Vision, rebooting systems after the alcohol.

Rain was pouring outside. They'd received a beautiful sunrise, but clouds had come to cover it as soon as they started driving. It was now pattering calmingly over the minibus.

\----------------

Natasha had sprung back into the bus, seeming unaffected, while dragging a still-sleepy Wanda behind her. Wanda hadn't drunk anything as she had a pretty low tolerance and didn't want to lose control of her powers, she had missed out on 4 hours of sleep though, and wasn't pleased.

They were sharing earbuds and Nat was humming along softly. She had one arm around her grumpy girlfriend and Wanda's mood was slowly lifting. Nat's humming lulled her to sleep eventually and Nat smiled to herself. Mission accomplished. She knew all of Wanda's mannerisms, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant, and knew when she needed help to sleep.

\----------------

Sam was a lot more cheerful after the beer (Bucky had a good mind to make him drink more often.) He even made some jokes and didn't grumble at Bucky for the entire 15 hours. He'd started humming Back in Black a few hours ago and Bucky had eventually given in, joining in with Stayin' Alive. They were both stumbling through You Should Be Dancing, now, and singing in incredibly high voices, much to Steve's annoyance.

When they stopped for food around 2, Steve and Bucky switched over so Bucky was driving - he hated driving, but he was the only entirely sober one, and Steve was having a hard time staying awake.

Thankfully, the rain had dried up, and the sun was blazing down as Bucky started driving. There was steam coming off the road because of the heat. It was crazy to drive through - like a concert where they'd gone overboard with the dry ice machines.

\----------------

They arrived at the holiday house just after 11pm. Bucky's mood had tanked after he'd started driving, and it showed: they'd gotten there earlier than expected due to an unforseen increase in speed towards the end. Steve had been singing with Sam too, but stopped soon after Bucky started mumbling ominously in Russian.

He'd heard "Я почти уверен, что взял с собой пистолет" and "Я не могу получить штраф за превышение скорости, если я быстрее полиции," which loosely translates to "I think I brought my gun," and "the police can't give me a ticket for speeding if I'm faster than them" - among other suspicious phrases.

Natasha had taught him some Russian vocab frequently used around the compound after the last mission, and he was growing increasingly concerned for Bucky's sanity.

When Bucky had pulled up at the holiday house Steve and Sam had gone out to pull the cases out of the trunk. When Steve came to get Bucky, he found a passed out assassin, flopped over the steering wheel. Steve had picked him up bridle style and carried him into the house. He got to choose their room first, so they were on the ground floor. Steve, much as he loved Bucky, didn't think he could make it up the stairs while carrying him.

\----------------

Tony and Stephen had been the next in. They were both clinging to eachother sleepily and had barely made it upstairs when they both fell asleep on the first bed they found. Nat and Sam had to physically lift Tony onto the bed. Stephen had just about managed to get on, but Tony had passed out over the edge of it, and was face first into the duvet.

Wanda and Nat took the room opposite them. Wanda fell asleep pretty quickly too, while Nat was buzzing from the dregs of alcohol still left in her system. She unpacked and arranged the room for both of them, before curling up next to Wanda to try to sleep.

\-----------------

Bruce and Thor were sharing the room down the hall with twin beds. Or at least, that what they'd been told. They hadn't quite realised the nature of these twin beds. Thor walked into the room and stopped abruptly, dropping his bag. Bruce, who wasn't paying attention, walked right into him.

"What's wrong? Please tell me there are two beds." Bruce groaned.

Thor turned around, his face covered in a huge smile. "I call top bunk!" He half yelled, before running into the room and scrambling up the ladder.

Bruce finally came into the room sighing. Could be worse, I guess. Throwing his bag in the corner of the room he pancaked on the bottom bunk and went to sleep. Thor did similarly soon after.

\---------------

Sam and Clint were also sharing a room. Thankfully they had normal, separate beds. Sam had gona to sleep pretty quickly, while Clint had stayed awake. His head was killing him, but he couldn't sleep. The tired feeling that came with wanting sleep just wasn't there.

Gulping down a paracetamol, Clint wandered out of the room to explore the rest of the house. Vision had gotten his own room and was reading Agatha Christie again; while Carol, Loki and Pietro were arguing over who got the last room.

It ended with Loki and Pietro sharing the room with Carol sleeping on the couch outside, in the hall. She didn't mind them sharing a room, but there was no way she wasn't going to listen in, just in case. She wasn't having them plotting unsupervised.

Clint continued his walk around the house. After walking through the kitchen he found the back door out to the patio. The tiles were still warm from the sun during the day. He strolled around the pool for a bit, arguing with himself silently. The roof looked inviting in the moonlight. But he was a guest. Guests don't walk on the roof. But... He was also an Avenger. He knew, if he were a civilian, he'd be proud to have an Avenger walk on his roof. I make a good point. He grinned to himself, before half running across the patio to the side of the house. He scaled up the stone wall relatively easily. It was one of the those big, sandy coloured ones, with stones sticking out at random angles in intervals. It's practically built to be climbed.

It was a perfectly clear night and he lay down against the heated roof tiles, careful not to dislodge any. The stars were gorgeous tonight. They spanned all the way across the sky. You just didn't get that kind of view in the city. Too much light pollution. Out here it was quiet. So incredibly quiet, and relaxing; comfortable even. Enough to make someone drift quietly off to sleep.


	5. Exploring Napa Valley

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Avengers spend time in Napa Valley, exploring and getting very drunk in some cases.

Clint woke to a very bright light. "Fuck off Sam... Turn the light out," be mumbled, rolling over. And off the roof. "You have goT TO BE KIDDING!"

He turned his head to see a red blob - his vision was still fuzzy. The quiet laughter then reached his ears and he swore again.

"Can you get up?" Nat asked softly. She was amused, but also marginally concerned for her friend's safety.

Clint moved his arms slowly and got onto his knees, wincing. He almost managed to stand, but crumpled in pain as he tried to put weight in his right leg. Nat face palmed.

"I'm gonna make Stephen check it," she said. Walking over, she crouched down and wrapped an arm around Clint's waist, heaving him up, and helping him into the kitchen. "Keep it elevated on the chairs, I'm going to get Stephen."

Grumbling, Clint complied.

\----------------

Nat knocked before entering. Normally she wouldn't with the other Avengers, but she had learnt from past mistakes with Tony and Stephen. Tony was face first on the pillow, just as she and Sam had left him last night. Stephen however, was in pyjamas under the covers - he must have gotten up in the night to change.

Stephen turned to face her - he was awake. "Keep the leg elevated, there's a first aid kit in one of my bags, I've got bandages and splints - I'm assuming you know how to apply them. He's pretty sturdy, so he should only be on crutches for 6 weeks. Good luck baby sitting him here," Stephen rambled out.

"What?"

"Clint. He fell off the roof. I heard the thud."

"That could have been anyone - you couldn't have known it was him." Natasha retorted. Stephen raised an eyebrow at her as she started going through his suitcase.

"Ok, even Pietro has more brain cells than him..." Natasha mulled it over for a bit. "But you couldn't have known the injury!"

"If he was ok, you would have laughed at him, I heard no laughter, and then you came to me, so it has to be something vaguely serious. You know how to set a broken arm, you aren't as confident with a leg though, so you needed my help. Can I sleep now?"

Nat grunted as she left the room with a first aid kit to patch up Clint.

Over the next two weeks the avengers all took it in turns to stay home with Clint. They watched movies, there were several barbeques, and a lot of card games. By the end of the week Clint could beat them all at Go Fish.

\----------------

Bruce, Vision, Thor, Sam and Rhodey spent most of the week being at least vaguely normal, and sight seeing. Well, as normal as things could get with Bruce and Thor - they were both instantly recognisable.

Bruce's favourite place was China Point Overlook. It was large and open air - no tiny passages or corridors- and the views were spectacular. They'd spent a whole day there, taking pictures and just sitting around talking. He'd missed this. Everything got so hectic during missions and saving the world - no time to appreciate the little things.

Vision liked Sonoma Park best. The history was fascinating and he could find thousands of articles on the old Mexican settlements. Rhodey liked it too, but more because he got to walk, than because of the the history lesson from Vision. The braces Tony had made for him worked incredibly well, but he'd never realised before how much effort walking meant. Now he got a great satisfaction just from walking into town and back, because he could. Walking through the park seemed almost surreal after everything that had happened, yet here he was. Walking. It amazed him and he loved it.

Thor's favourite part was the Jessel art gallery. Much to everyone's suprise, he loved art. He couldn't paint to save someone's life, but he had a great appreciation for others' talents at it and liked the beautiful, sunny scapes on display. He could spend hours, lost in the little worlds the artists had created.

Sam was more conventional. He liked the fine food at the restaurants on 1st Street. Good food and good company, he wasn't fussed by much else. The parks were nice and all, but this was his holiday after he and his team had saved the world. He felt he was allowed to be lazy, just for 2 weeks.

\----------------

Tony and Stephen did very little over the two weeks. Tony spent a lot of time at the beach, he promised Morgan he'd bring her back some shells, so he and Stephen had gone beach combing on several occasions.

They'd also gone snorkeling, like drunk Stephen had asked. That was pretty amazing. There were huge shoals of sea bass that had swum around them and they'd seen several brightly coloured star fish glued to rocks. There were huge hydrocorals too. Not as many as there were though - lots had been destroyed by fishing.

One day Stephen had rented kayaks for them both. They'd started out fine, but Tony could not steer for toffee, so they'd gone back to get a 2 person kayak. This meant Stephen paddled, while Tony sulked behind him.

On the plus side, they'd found a little cove around the corner from the main beach and had stayed there for the day - here Tony had managed to find shells like Morgan had asked.

The cove was sheltered, covered in by sky-high, yellowy walls. The beach was half was between shingle and sand - part of it was little gritty bits, while the other was small pebbles and pieces of broken shells. Stephen had actually come prepared with water and sandwiches, which were only slightly soggy, so they'd eaten those in the afternoon.

Stephen had spent most of the morning laying stretched out on the sand watching the sea, while Tony climbed the rocks at the base of the cliff, trying to find more shells. After the sandwiches were gone they swam together for a bit, cooling off in the sea, before returning the kayak.

\----------------

Natash and Wanda had gone all around the local area in their two week stay. Wanda wanted to go shopping, and had gotten small trinkets for everyone who couldn't come on the trip. She even had a paperweight for Nick.

Natasha had dragged her to all the local sport clubs too. There were the standard squash courts and basket ball courts, but there was also an archery range and a place where you could learn to throw knives. That was Natasha's favourite place.

They'd dressed in everyday clothes, so almost no one recognised them.

"Why are we here?!" Wanda had grumbled, "you know how to throw knives, you don't need a beginner's class. You could hit a fly from 3 miles away."

"I've taken these classes before - trust me when I say it'll be fun," Natasha grinned in reply.

When they joined the class 3 other men were already there, chatting. They took no notice as Nat and Wanda arrived. The lesson was simple and the teacher was good, they got 10 throws each to start with. One of the men went first, hitting the target 6/10 times. He looked pretty pleased with himself and his friends were cheering. Wanda went next and hit it 4 times. Barely. The other two blokes had a similar skill level to her. Then it was Natasha's turn. She nailed the bullsey 7 times, hit the ring just outside it twice, and the edge of the target once. The rest of the group stared in in shock while Nat looked particularly pleased with herself.

"You done this before?" The instructor asked.

"Oh, no. Just lucky I guess," Nat smiled sweetly. Wanda could see the smugness behind it.

The lesson continued like this. Nat hitting the targets perfectly each time, the first guy getting better, and his friends and Wanda still trying to get the right end of the knife embedded in the target. The first guy was frowning intensely the whole time.

At the end, he approached Natasha.

"Hi, um, I'm Allan, and you were amazing. Could I get your number?" he asked.

"I actually already have a girlfriend, but thanks," Nat replied, grinning.

"Oh," Allan smiled, "I never stood a chance then. Either way though, me, Jack and Lukas were gonna get a coffee down the road. You two wanna join us?"

Wanda looked sceptically at Natasha.

"Just as friends, I mean," Allan added. "I promise. Nothing weird, just coffee."

Nat shrugged at Wanda. "Yeah ok," Wanda replied, smiling. Nat had been right. This was fun.

\----------------

Steve and Bucky had taken a different approach to the holiday. They'd gone round every vine yard in the area, wine tasting. This would be romantic, were it not for the intentions behind it. Steve had found back in the 40s that he couldn't get drunk. Now it was time to put that to the test, he'd decided, and Bucky wholly agreed.

It had taken 5 days of almost constant drinking before they were both a bit tipsy - and wonderfully pleased with themselves.

"I'd say our results were conclusive," Steve said, finally feeling that buzz he'd missed for decades.

"God I've missed this," Bucky replied.

They were currently sitting on the decking opposite the pool back at the house. They were on Clint duty today, and were making their way through the hand-crafted wine they'd purchased over the last week. It was sunny - no suprise there - and Steve was lying back in one of the big padded sunloungers. Bucky was sitting with his legs arcoss Steve's, and one arm around his waist. The other was holding a glass of Monticello.

"I remember back in the 40s this would have been unheard of," Bucky grinned. "We could have been killed for this. Now look at us."

"Two gay, drunk 90 years olds watching their dumbass friend, who fell off the roof?" Steve questioned, making them both laugh.

"I meant happy." Bucky put down his glass and turned slightly. "If it was the 40s, I wouldn't be allowed to do this..."

Trailing off, Bucky kissed Steve softly, but deeply. Steve set his glass down, but missed the table so it shattered on the floor. Neither man noticed. Too caught up in the feel of eachother.

Vague yelling was heard, making Steve break the kiss for a minute.

"You hear something?" He asked Bucky.

Clint's voice came again, much clearer this time. Something about Doritos.

Steve grinned, shrugging, "nah, nothing but sweet silence and your heavy breathing."

Bucky pushed Steve back into the chair this time, kissing him more roughly than before. Running fingers through hair. Trailing hands over shoulders and down over hips.

\----------------

Carol, Loki and Pietro spent most of the holiday together. Pietro was glad to find people who took him seriously; Loki was glad to find people willing to be his friend - no strings attached; Carol babysat them both, making sure no one died.

Loki spent the first few days in his and Pietro's room, crying on his bed over Asgard. Pietro found out when he accidentally walked in on Loki listening to Tom Odel and hugging a photo of his mother one evening. Rather than asking, Pietro just sat down in the edge of the bed, arms open, and was almost tackled by a sobbing Loki.

Carol came in later to find Pietro watching Fast and Furious, Loki asleep and curled up into him. There were tear tracks still staining Loki's cheeks, but both his friends knew he'd prefer it if they didn't notice it. Instead Carol had gently shaken him awake and the three had made (or at least had attempted to make) burgers. It ended with Pietro setting fire to the meat and shrieking, while Loki smiled fondly in the background, and Carol ordering in Chinese.

Later in the week - don't ask why - but they'd been talking about sombreros, and Loki was looking puzzled.

"Have you never seen them before?" Carol asked, genuinely curious.

"No... What's a sombrero?!" Loki was getting exasperated.

"Carol, get your money, were buying sombreros," Pietro said, standing up. Loki was still looking very confused.

"We can't, were on bird watching duty."

"HeY, CliNT!" Pietro yelled, "We'rE goNNA BuY somBreROS."

A noncommittal grunt was heard in response.

"The coffee is in the far right cupboard and your crutches are under the sofa," Carol called before they left.

\----------------

They walked to First Street and into the Mall. It was more high-end than Pietro had planned. No sombreros.

"You could have just shown me a photo you know," Loki said.

"Yeah, but this got us out of the house."

"Guys, I'm gonna split for a bit, I wanna find something for Maria while I'm here. She'd really love the clothes," Carol said. "Don't die. Or kill anyone."

"But that's the fun part!" Loki teased. Carol glared in response before leaving to find presents for Maria and Monica.

Once Carol had left Pietro turned to Loki, grinning. "Ice-cream time," he said, grabbing Loki's hand and pulling him along. Loki blushed slightly but was happy to comply. Especially as someone was offering free ice-cream.

First Street was beautiful. There was tons of traffic on the main road, but the other streets leading off were pedestrian only. They had tables from restaurants lining the sides and the parasols looked like giant versions of the ones people put in drinks. The buildings were big and rectangular - they would have looked imposing were it not for their soft, sandy colour and the fact that there were potted plants and palm trees everywhere.

Loki and Pietro stood in the queue, seemingly miles long, Pietro still clutching Loki's hand.

"You're.. still holding...." Loki stumbled over his words, eventually choosing to hold up their hands instead.

"Your point being?" Pietro inquired, smiling softly, but with a smug undertone.

"Nothing," Loki looked away and smiled at the floor. Pietro twined their fingers together at this reaction, making Loki turn redder and look intently at the wall, the sky, anywhere but the tall, handsome, smiling blonde next to him.

This wasn't supposed to happen. This never happened. He didn't get feelings like this. Or if he did, they were never reciprocated. It was nice though. It felt warm and fuzzy, melting the icy grip that had encompassed his heart over the last few years. Like watching and icecube melt in the sun, or marshmallows in hot chocolate. Maybe I should try this more often.

Pietro got a vanilla cone, not wanting too much sugar, meanwhile Loki got mint choc chip, with marshmallows and melty chocolate. They spent a few hours trailing through shops together and chatting, before meeting up with Carol in Kohl's. They got a cab back to the house seeing as Carol had so many bags.

\----------------

At home Carol called Pietro to the minibus, after Loki went inside, claiming she needed a hand with the bags. She didn't. Obviously.

"How'd it go with Loki? Did it go as you planned?" She grinned.

"Yeah, he was really sweet. We got ice-cream and talked for a few hours, then went through some shops and he bought some black gloves." Pietro smiled to himself at the memory.

"You gonna ask him out properly? There's a great little place..."

"Yeah yeah, I've got a plan. Stop prying," Pietro said jokingly. "You put your bags for your girlfriend away." Before he stalked back into the house.

Loki was waiting in the living room. He had a book up over his nose, trying to look like he was reading. It wasn't working. You could see his eyes weren't focused on the page, and he started tapping his foot nervously when Pietro came in.

"Pietro..." He started.

"Yeah, what's up?"

"Uhhh, well. I was wondering, there was a restaurant back where we were walking that looked quite erm, good. The roof top bar... There's supposed to be amazing views. Um, do you want to go with me there this evening? Like, a date, maybe?" It sort of worked. It had sounded better in Loki's head - there wasn't meant to be all the pauses. Oh well.

Pietro's face lit up, "I'd love to go," he laughed a little and rubbed the back of his neck, "I was actually about to ask you the same thing."

"We'll leave at 6.30 then... I'll make reservations." Loki was about to leave when Pietro came over to him, brushing a hand down his arm, gently, carefully.

"Thank you Loki. It sounds really fun," Pietro said, quieter this time. He was going to kiss Loki properly, but he freaked out last minute and instead just gave him a small kiss on the cheek. Before he could move back though, he felt a pair of soft, cold lips against his for a brief moment, before Loki turned and flapped dramatically out of the room to call the restaurant.

\----------------

This holiday was much deserved, and definitely worth it, the Avengers thought. (Except Clint.)


End file.
